Cancer and Fishnet Stockings
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Cancer and Fishnet Stockings

How Humor Helped Me Survive A Life-threatening Disease, the Loss of My Favorite Nail Polish...and Other Calamities
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Maryann Grau
eBook Typ:
Adobe Digital Editions
eBook Format:
Adobe DRM [Hard-DRM]

“This is a book that will help cancer patients. It will inspire, motivate, engender thought and yes, make you laugh.  I will highly recommend it to all my patients.” Dr. Brian DiCarlo, Oncologist.

What does a story about a woman who had just been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer have to do with fishnet stockings, a flood, some Russians, the Tenth Commandment, superheroes and Galileo? 

In a brief two-year period of mishap and mayhem—the effects of chemo, car crashes, asbestos, a hip replacement, conflicting emotions, guilt and envy—the author began a series of email updates to family and friends to keep them abreast of her treatments and to allay their fears that, as is often the case with pancreatic cancer, she had just been handed a death sentence.  Those updates, delivered with humor and a delightful sassiness, expanded to include other catastrophic life events and became the driving force behind her book.  In the author’s words, “humor was important because, without the ability to laugh, the urge to surrender would be too strong.” 

This book will inspire people of all ages from all walks of life but will be especially meaningful for those facing difficult life challenges, particularly those with a serious or life-threatening disease, such as cancer.



Chapter 1        Harold’s Pancakes             

Chapter 2        Can This Be Happening to Me? 

Chapter 3        You Can’t Shop if You’re Dead

Chapter 4        A Virgo With a Plan, Or Is That Redundant?

Chapter 5        Fishnet Stockings

Chapter 6        Doctor Doom: The Musical

Chapter 7        Ode to “The Californians”

Chapter 8        Meatballs and Helicopter Moms

Chapter 9        The Oncology Center

Chapter 10      Little Green What? 

Chapter 11      Ali’s Artichoke Ravioli…and More

Chapter 12      Chemo Buddy

Chapter 13      Grandchildren: Life’s Greatest Reward

Chapter 14      Stripes or Checks? 

Chapter 15      How Can I Help?

Chapter 16      Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Chapter 17      Legal Issues

Chapter 18      Bam! Zap! Kapow!

Chapter 19      Spend All Your Kisses

Chapter 20      The Bald Spots

Chapter 21      False Alarm!

Chapter 22      Joy Is Not the Absence of Pain

Chapter 23      Frankenstein and Wine

Chapter 24      A Year of Living Dangerously

Chapter 25      Two to Five

Chapter 26      Dragon Slayer

Chapter 27      Me and Galileo

Chapter 28      Slaying the Dragon Slayer

Chapter 29      Bionic Woman

Chapter 30      I’m Alive, So Why Not Shop?

Chapter 31      It’s My Body and I’ll Cry If I Want To…

Chapter 32      Ducking Bullets

Chapter 33      Fear Is a Reaction, Courage Is a Decision.

Chapter 34      Speaking of Heaven

Chapter 35      Bucket List?

Chapter 36      A Dream

Chapter 37      I’ve Been Through Hell and I’m Not Gonna Take It Anymore!

Chapter 38      Should I Kill Myself or Have a Cup of Coffee?

Chapter 39    Spoiler Alert:  I’m still Here 
Chapter 40      R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Chapter 41      Never Give In, Never Give In, Never, Never, Never!

Chapter 42      “Cancer Is Cool…,” Said No One, Anywhere, Ever!

Chapter 43      Harold’s Pancake Recipe